It is common to feel eager about jumping back into the dating scene following your divorce. How soon is too soon to start dating again? Ideally, you should reach a state of emotional acceptance about your divorce, which each person achieves at their own pace. However, it is a bad idea for anyone to start dating while their divorce is still ongoing. You are unlikely to have moved past your marriage when it is technically not over. Even if you think you are emotionally ready, dating during your divorce may hurt your ability to achieve your divorce goals:

  1. Your Spouse Will Be Upset: Your spouse may become more difficult to negotiate with if they learn that you are seeing new romantic partners. Even though you both know that your relationship is over, they will likely feel hurt and betrayed that you have already started dating again. Your spouse may retaliate by being more stubborn and vindictive towards you, which will make it more difficult to reach a compromise.
  2. Your Personal Finances Will Be Scrutinized: There are expenses involved with dating someone, and your spouse may use your dating to gain an advantage in the financial aspects of your divorce agreement. Are you using marital money to pay for your dates or buy gifts for the person you are dating? If you are spending a sizeable amount of money, your spouse may argue that this should be taken out of your share of the marital assets. Are you living with the person you are dating? You might not be able to claim spousal maintenance if there is someone else who is financially supporting you.
  3. Your Parental Responsibilities May Be Threatened: Your spouse may question your priorities as a parent if you are dating while your children are still adjusting to your divorce. Seeing you with a new partner this early in the process is more likely to upset your children. There may also be concerns about whether your children are safe around this person.
  4. Your Focus Will Be Further Divided: You are already juggling responsibilities for completing your divorce, caring for your children, and keeping up with your professional career. Do you really have the time and energy to add dating to that? It may be irresponsible to take your focus away from any of those responsibilities in order to satisfy your desire to date.

Contact a St. Charles, Illinois, Divorce Lawyer

You have the right to decide how soon you should start dating, but you should understand the consequences of dating during your divorce. A Kane County divorce attorney at Goostree Law Group wants you to be in the strongest position to get what you need from your divorce agreement. To schedule a free consultation, call 630-584-4800.