The divorce journey looks and feels different for every couple, with varying shades of complexity. From the amicable to the horrendous, divorces manifest in all kinds of distinct ways, depending on the circumstances surrounding the relationship and if children are involved. Something every divorce has in common, however, is that they are all emotionally charged events by nature. Regardless of how civil both parties are with one another throughout the process, everyone involved is bound to experience emotional pain and discomfort, especially as the divorce proceedings develop. Difficult issues can arise that must not only be discussed but also resolved between both parties in order to make progress and move forward.
Typical Setbacks and What to Do When They Happen to You
Conflicts, even small ones, are inevitable throughout the divorce process. Here are some issues that commonly cause setbacks for both parties during the transition and how to address them when they happen to you:
Parenting time conflicts – If you and your spouse share children, you may quickly discover that you have different ideas of what parenting time should look like after the separation. It is not uncommon for couples to think they are on the same page regarding child custody issues, such as who will get the children on weekends and holidays, only to find they have drastically different feelings once the divorce is underway. Parenting time conflicts can turn into time-consuming, ongoing battles if not addressed early on. A positive course of action is to work with a well-seasoned, qualified family law attorney to create a fair, cohesive parenting plan to submit to the court for review. Should any modifications be necessary, your attorney can guide you through these changes from start to finish.
A repetitive dynamic – Psychology experts believe that any existing dynamic between you and your spouse before the divorce went into effect is likely to creep up again during and after the divorce, which can prove to be very problematic. For example, if you and your spouse have always been competitive with one another, that competitive nature may surface as you begin discussing sensitive topics such as the division of assets or who should be responsible for which debts. A good approach to this is to identify these dynamics and make yourself aware of them from the start, so you can hopefully avoid bringing them with you into the courtroom.
Placing children in the middle of disputes – This can be a huge setback and major hurdle to overcome as you get closer to finalizing the divorce. Throughout the process, emotions are amplified and tend to be stronger than ever. This creates a prime opportunity for stressed-out parents to unintentionally place their kids in the middle of their disputes. For example, your spouse may have your child relay messages to you or make passive-aggressive statements in their presence. He or she may even have your child spy on you and report back to him or her, in order to somehow get the upper hand in legal matters. When things turn tense, and your kids are suddenly placed in the middle of the conflict, it is time to consult with a professional to prevent things from getting further out of hand.
Contact a DuPage County Divorce Attorney
Even if two spouses are amicable during their divorce, the process can still be unpredictable. Setbacks happen, even under the best of circumstances, but they do not have to wreak havoc on the outcome of your divorce case. Speak with a skilled Lombard, IL parenting time lawyer to protect your rights and the best interests of your family. Call A. Traub & Associates today at 630-426-0196 to schedule a personal consultation.