Law Offices of Michael F. Roe LLC

Our law and dispute resolution practice is focused on complex divorce and custody cases, domestic violence, parentage (paternity) cases, and post decree support and custody modification. Many of the office's cases include issues of contested child custody, property division, restoring visitation with children, modification of support, prosecuting or defending Orders of Protection, and domestic battery cases.

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Years ago, I helped write and edit elements of Bill Eddy’s landmark book Splitting that offered readers, for the first time, guidance and understanding of personality disorders in the context of a high conflict divorce. Today, Bill continues to educate and help other navigate the difficulties of parenting and divorcing with a HCP (high conflict person).

“In this episode, Megan Hunter dives into the world of high conflict personalities.  Megan takes the opportunity to answer listener questions and provide valuable insights on identifying and dealing with individuals who exhibit high conflict behaviors. Throughout the episode, she offers practical strategies for
Continue Reading Illinois Divorce: “It’s All Your Fault”: High Conflict People

The issue of cohabitation in Illinois divorce cases is an interesting one.  Sometimes, a spouse that is receiving maintenance support engages in a relationship with a third party after the divorce. The payor spouse many times feels a bit cheated, in that a former spouse (payee)  receives financial support while at the same time dating someone exclusively and sharing their home with him/her.  In Mattson, a former husband felt burned that he was paying support to his ex-wife while she was engaging in a lengthy relationship with a Chicago sportscaster. The former husband hired private investigators to watch the former
Continue Reading Illinois Divorce: New Rule 23 Appellate case dealing with Cohabitation

Quick Question: What is Parental Alienation?
Parental alienation refers to a situation where one parent deliberately influences their child to reject, fear, or show hostility toward the other parent. This can happen through manipulation, badmouthing the other parent, or restricting contact between the child and the other parent. The goal of the alienating parent is often to damage the child’s relationship with the other parent, often during or after a divorce or separation.

Parental alienation can have serious emotional and psychological impacts on children. It can distort their understanding of family dynamics and cause long-term issues like anxiety, depression, and
Continue Reading Illinois Divorce: Quick Question: What is Parental Alienation?

Reunification therapy is a specialized form of therapy that focuses on repairing relationships between estranged family members. It is often used in cases of parental alienation, high conflict divorce, or other situations where family bonds between parents and children have been damaged.

The goal of reunification therapy is to:

  • Rebuild trust: Help family members rebuild trust and communication.

Continue reading →
Continue Reading Illinois Divorce: Primer: What is Reunification (Reintegration ) Therapy?

How do you know it is parental alienation—and not justified rejection and estrangement?
In a case where a child rejects contact with a parent, a psychological evaluator or skilled GAL can determine if the rejection is unwarranted, which is called parental alienation, by making a thorough investigation of the empirical facts over time. If the child has a legitimate reason to reject a parent, it is called estrangement. There are in my experience cases where both factors can exist: a targeted parent is being alienated and then acts in negative ways with the child that solidify the estrangement.
An evaluator
Continue Reading Illinois Divorce Lawyer: How do you know it is parental alienation?

PASG Conference for Members:
September 4-6, 2024 in Oslo, Norway

Dear Michael Roe:
We at Parental Alienation Study Group anxiously await our upcoming world conference in Oslo, Norway. The program looks great and final preparations are being made! We hope to see you in beautiful Oslo during September 4-6, 2024.
For PASG members as well as students, the registration fee is 1,000 Norwegian kroner, which is about USD $100. Full conference tickets for everyone else is NOK 3,500.
If you are unable to attend in person, Digital Participation (streaming) will cost you NOK 1,500. But, sign up soon!
Here’s the
Continue Reading Illinois Divorce: Parental Alienation Study Group

Surviving a marriage with a spouse who has narcissistic personality traits can be incredibly challenging. Many of my cases through the years have involved the opposing spouse with traits of NPD, or BPD, or traits of comorbidity of both. Here are some strategies to help navigate this difficult situation:
1. Educate Yourself

  • Understanding Narcissism: Learn about narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) to understand the behaviors and traits associated with it.

Continue reading →
Continue Reading Illinois Divorce: Surviving a spouse who has narcissistic personality traits

Confusion still reigns with respect to the tax treatment of spousal maintenance for Illinois divorce cases. I still see other law firms discussing online spousal maintenance (support) using the old rules.
In Illinois, spousal maintenance (also known in other states as alimony) is generally not tax-deductible for the payor nor taxable income for the recipient. This change came into effect due to the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act (TCJA) of 2017, which significantly altered the tax treatment of spousal support (maintenance)  nationwide.
Under the TCJA, for divorce or separation agreements executed after December 31, 2018, maintenance payments are no longer
Continue Reading DuPage Divorce Lawyer: Is Spousal Maintenance Still Tax Deductible?

Introducing children to a new romantic partner, or “paramour,” during or after a divorce is a delicate matter that should be approached with careful consideration and sensitivity to the children’s needs and emotions. Here are some factors to consider when determining the appropriate timing for such introductions:

  • Stability and Adjustment: It’s generally recommended to wait until the divorce process has reached a point where the children have had time to adjust to the changes in their family dynamics and establish a sense of stability. Rushing into introductions too soon can add additional stress and emotional harm for children still grappling

  • Continue Reading Kane County Divorce: When is it Appropriate for Kids to Meet a Paramour?

    My practice has managed successfully cases dealing with NPD traits for many years. People with toxic narcissistic traits can cause a lot of harm and damage in a marriage and with children. In a divorce, people with toxic narcissistic traits can continue their self-centered toxicity, blaming, gaslighting, and other harmful behaviors. Narcissists can present significant challenges in a marriage, as well as a divorce, due to their characteristic traits which often include:

  • Lack of Empathy: Narcissists typically have difficulty understanding or empathizing with their partner’s feelings and perspectives. This can lead to emotionally abusive behaviors.
  • Self-Centeredness: Narcissists tend to prioritize

  • Continue Reading DuPage Divorce Lawyer: Toxic Narcissists and Divorce

    One aspect of the divorce case I take seriously is managing the request to the judge for a guardian ad litem in a contested parenting dispute.  Sometimes, there are behavioral and psychological issues in a divorce with one of the parents, that can impact the ability of that parent to safely care for the child or children. A guardian ad litem (GAL) plays a crucial role in divorce cases, particularly when the interests of children are involved. Here’s how they typically assist the court:

  • Representing the Best Interests of the Child: The primary role of a GAL is to advocate

  • Continue Reading DuPage County Divorce Lawyer: How does the GAL Assist in a Divorce with Children?

    I received a call today from a potential client in Illinois whose partner/spouse left the State of Illinois and set up life with the minor children in another state.  As I look back on decades of my Family Law career, I have had a number of similar cases. Sometimes, when a marriage falls apart, a spouse takes the children out of state and goes “home” to where he or she grew up and has family locally. In this situation, sometimes the spouses will file a divorce case is two different states. How does the law handle and reconcile the fact
    Continue Reading Kane County Divorce: Why is the UCCJEA Important in Illinois Child Custody Issues?

    Through the decades of practicing divorce and child custody law in Illinois, I have encountered the myriad reasons that a spouse or couple is seeking a divorce.  In some cases, there are serious behavioral issues that make staying together unhealthy for the marriage, and unhealthy for the children. In a minority of time that people meet with me for a complimentary initial consultation, the issues are fixable…for example, young couples that need counseling to learn how to manage conflicts in a marriage. I always encourage fixable family situations to seek counseling or other behavioral health modalities before initiating a divorce
    Continue Reading Kane County Divorce: What are some Reasons People Divorce?

    In Illinois, child custody (now called allocations of parenting time and decision making) can be modified through the courts if there is a substantial change in circumstances that warrants a modification. In general, the modification will be sought after two years has expired from the original judgment, but some cases allow for a modification before two years if the issues presented are serious, or if the changes are moderate and needed to serve the interests of the child(ren).

    Here are the basic steps:

  • File a Petition in Kane County: The process begins by filing a petition with the court requesting

  • Continue Reading Kane County Divorce: Modifying a Child Custody (Allocation) Order

    One aspect of my practice is to deliver high level legal skill to my clients, while at the same time optimizing their outcomes in a cost-effective manner. Divorces don’t need to cost an “arm and a leg.”
    Divorce can be emotionally and financially taxing for all parties involved. While the emotional aspect might be harder to mitigate, there are several strategies to save on the cost of divorce:

  • Mediation: Consider opting for mediation instead of litigation. Mediation involves a neutral third party who assists in facilitating discussions and negotiations between spouses to reach mutually acceptable agreements. It’s often faster, less

  • Continue Reading DuPage Divorce: Divorces don’t need to cost an “arm and a leg.”