Most of us have a word – or several – that makes us cringe every time we hear it. But you may have never really thought about the word that can make your divorce and your children’s transition to divorce much harder than it needs to be. What is that word? “Visit.” As in, “You are going to visit your father this weekend.” Or “When you visit me, I want you to go to bed at 9:00.”
Why should this word be erased from your language where your children are concerned? Most of us think of “visit” in terms of friends coming over to visit or Great Aunt Alice coming from Phoenix to visit. The term “visit” or “visitation” rarely extends to children and parents because they are not “visitors” in one another’s lives; they are family. Now more than ever, your children need to hang on to the connectedness they had with each parent before the divorce.
Perhaps this is why the state changed the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act in 2016, erasing the words “custody” and “visitation” from the statutes and changing them to “allocation of parental responsibilities.” You may be surprised to find that your Naperville, IL lawyer has the compassion and resources necessary to help you and your children move forward in the best way possible. This can include getting rid of old words and using words with more positive connotations.