Hinsdale divorce lawyerDivorce can be tough on children. They are used to having both parents around and accessible all the time. Transitioning to a new parenting time schedule can be jarring, as it disrupts their routine. It is important for parents to work together during divorce in order to help the children adjust and feel safe.

Children tend to do much better with their parents’ divorce when it is clear to them that both parents are putting them first throughout the process. If your divorce is amicable, this may be easier to do. If there is a high level of conflict, it may be more difficult. Either way, it is important that parents be able to put their differences aside at least briefly during interactions with the children. Note that it is a different situation entirely if your children need protection from an abusive or dangerous parent. An attorney can help you strategize. 

Functioning as Co-Parents During Your Divorce

Divorce is a big adjustment not only for your children, but for you. While prioritizing your children, you should also care for yourself. Some tips for making sure your children’s best interests are prioritized include: 

  • Fight elsewhere – Do not argue or fight with your spouse in front of your children, no matter how frustrating your spouse’s behavior is. If your spouse tries to start an argument, tell them to discuss it later when the children are not around and change the subject. 
  • Keep a schedule – If you have a temporary custody agreement or order in place, it is important that you stick to it perfectly. Make sure you arrive for the custody exchange on time, every time. 
  • Do not “coach” your children – If custody is going to be disputed in court, quite a few parents will “coach” their children to say nasty things about the other parent in an effort to gain more parenting time. Do not do this – it is usually fairly clear to a court or Guardian ad Litem when coaching has occurred. 
  • Vent elsewhere – Your children are not the right people to vent to about your spouse or your frustrations dealing with divorce. Plan an evening with your friends instead. 
  • Get help – It may be a good idea to seek counseling for your children, individually or with you as a family.

If Your Children Need Protection From Your Spouse

If your spouse has abused you or the children, or would put the children in harm’s way, then cooperative co-parenting is not really an option. If you can show that your spouse has been abusive, you can likely obtain a protection order that includes your children. Protection orders can stop your spouse from harming or even contacting your children, and prevent them from returning to the marital home or to your children’s schools. 

Call a DuPage County Child Custody Lawyer

Botti Marinaccio, LTD. can help you make sure that your children are the top priority throughout your divorce action. Our experienced Burr Ridge child custody attorneys will develop a personalized strategy for your divorce case that is informed by your children’s needs and interests. Call us at 630-575-8585 for a free consultation. 

 

Source:

How to Help Your Child After a Breakup or Divorce

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