Being married to a narcissist can be horrible. Divorcing a narcissist can also be difficult. Narcissists believe that the world should revolve around them and that they should have the power to call all the shots. You may hear a form of narcissism colloquially referred to as “main character syndrome,” which likely rings true for you. Getting a narcissist to compromise on anything can be a huge challenge.
Narcissists are incredibly reluctant to make any type of concession when it comes to getting what they want. They may be willing to lie to get their way. They may lob false or grossly exaggerated accusations at you. You should be prepared for the likelihood that you may have to go to divorce litigation if collaborative divorce tactics fail. Either way, it is essential that you are represented by an aggressive lawyer. Botti Marinaccio, LTD. will always put you first.
Helpful Tips for Divorce When Your Spouse Is a Narcissist
As if divorce were not already emotionally difficult, narcissists make it even harder. Tips include:
- Stay the course – When a narcissist does not want to get divorced, they will try anything. They may make “grand gestures” of romance in an attempt to get you to stay. Do not fall for it. The second you agree to stay, they will resume their normal behavioral patterns.
- Get counseling – Narcissists have a way of playing mind games with the people close to them. You are likely experiencing a whirlwind of emotions while trying to leave, and a professional counselor can help you sort through them.
- Ignore guilt trips – Your spouse is likely to use “guilt trips” to get their way. They may make a big show about how hard it would be for them if they do not get what they are asking for – they will be homeless if they cannot keep the house, or they will have no money to live if they have to pay alimony. Ignore this manipulation. Your spouse is an adult.
- Be ready for litigation – Narcissists rarely cooperate with collaborative divorce in any meaningful sense. You may have to choose between conceding to most of their demands or going to court.
- Communicate through lawyers – It is generally best if you do not speak to your spouse at all during the process. All communication should go through your attorneys. This reduces the chances of emotional manipulation.
It is important that you focus on yourself and your children, if you have any. Making a clean break from a narcissistic spouse can be a challenge, but it can be done.
Let a DuPage County Divorce Attorney Fight for You
At Botti Marinaccio, LTD., we understand the difficulties of divorcing a narcissistic spouse. Our experienced Western Springs divorce lawyers will take extra care to protect you from the challenges of leaving this type of marriage. Call us at 630-575-8585 for a free consultation.