wheaton divorce lawyerSo much of the content about the topic of divorce involves the period before and during the Illinois divorce process. Books, blogs, and TV series spend far more time focusing on the conflict of divorce and the difficulty of the process; the story often ends when each partner waltzes off into the sunset, newly and happily single. 

As many divorcees can attest, however, the truth is more complicated and not quite so easy. Life after divorce can feel a bit like being suspended in midair. You still have the ongoing sense of urgency from the divorce – the feeling that tasks need to be done, the anticipation of something about to happen – but more time to yourself with far less to do. There is no longer a process, a plan. It can be hard to know what to do next. If you are getting divorced and are wondering what to expect about adjusting to life after the divorce is finalized, here are four things you will not often hear about life after divorce. 

Life As You Knew it Has Changed

Some people hope to minimize the effects of divorce – which is understandable, given that so many of those effects have the potential to be quite negative. But denying or avoiding the necessary changes you need to make after divorce can lead to poor decisions and a longer healing process. You will probably need to budget more carefully, adjust your living space, and process the physical and emotional changes. 

You Lose Certain Friends and Family

Even if your in-laws love you and your neighbors were the best, for all but the most amicable divorces, staying in touch with certain friends and family is not possible. People get divorced for good reasons, and everyone has their perspective on the situation. It can be very difficult for family and friends not to take sides, no matter how much they love you. 

You Are Probably Going to Feel Alone Sometimes 

You can feel totally sure about your divorce but still feel sad and lonely after it is over. Just the presence of another person in the house can be comforting, even when you are not particularly fond of that person. If you have children, the house can feel very quiet and strange when they begin spending time at their other parent’s house. It is important not to run away from the feelings of loneliness, but also not to let yourself sink into them completely. Many people enjoy using this time after divorce to begin exploring themselves again. 

It is Hard Not to Take Your Ex’s Dating Personally 

Your ex might rebound quickly into another relationship. They may have already been dating during the divorce. Even if you broke up because of problems you had, your ex’s new relationships are not about you – they are about your ex. Try not to fixate on your ex and avoid contact with him or her whenever possible. 

Call an Experienced Wheaton, IL Divorce Lawyer 

Anticipating life after divorce is an important part of making an overall divorce plan. At The Stogsdill Law Firm, P.C., we may not be able to do the hard work of adjusting to life after divorce for you, but we excel at helping you manage the legal and logistical aspects of divorce so you can focus on your family and personal life. Call us today at 630-462-9500 to schedule an initial case review with one of our experienced DuPage County divorce attorneys. 






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