For those going through a divorce, the process of ending a marriage can all too often create a sense of tunnel vision. Due to the mental strain and the waves of emotion that come with this major life change, people tend to focus only on the immediate needs in front of them during such a time, like making it through the legal paperwork or court proceedings. Other priorities may also capture a person’s attention in the midst of handling the technical details, from creating parenting plans and making new living arrangements to possibly relocating.
The Decision to Get a Divorce Is Only the Beginning
From the moment you and your spouse decide to end your relationship, the task of pursuing a divorce can be overwhelming, even when the decision is an amicable one. Sadly, calling it quits is just the beginning when it comes to moving forward. Once you make it through the actual divorce process, rebuilding your life piece by piece is a challenge, but it can also be an opportunity for positive growth and healthy changes. The key is to strategize and put a game plan in place for yourself so that you have a sense of direction and clarity following the end of your marriage.
Creating a Game Plan
You can prepare for a happy, healthy life after your divorce by starting with these four steps:
Re-Evaluate – A major part of starting a new chapter following a divorce is re-discovering who you are, what you need, and how you spend your time and energy. To decrease your stress levels, cope with your grief, and find the strength to move forward, start by re-evaluating your life and what you believe you want — and need — in order to be happy. Envision what you would like your environment and lifestyle to look like, and write down the steps you can take to get there.
Make Yourself a Priority – Psychology and divorce experts have stated that self-care is critical during a divorce transition. Do not forget to take time for yourself each day to do something that brings you joy or peace. This can be something as simple as taking the dog for a leisurely walk or treating yourself to ice cream. Taking time for yourself to do simple things you enjoy will allow you to recharge, and it will also remind you what it is that makes you happy when you are on your own, without a partner to keep you company.
Identify Roadblocks – No matter how much effort you put into self-care and creating a new list of goals, you will inevitably feel stuck in your sadness and grief from time to time. Healing from divorce is a process, and it does not happen overnight — there will be good days and bad days. When you feel stuck, the important thing is to write down what you are feeling and what you think is causing those feelings. Once you know the source of the problem, you can begin looking for solutions. For example, if a negative thought cycle takes hold as soon as you wake up in the morning, changing your routine may be the answer. Instead of sitting and dwelling on your anxious thoughts while you drink your morning cup of coffee, try going for a run or hitting the gym to get rid of your restlessness. Repeat this every day, and little by little, your mindset will evolve along with your new routine.
Ask For Help – When you have done all you can do on your own to feel better, and you are still struggling to get through the day, it is important to ask for help. Draw on your support system, speak to a therapist, or join a local support group where you can interact with others going through the same struggles. You can get a jump start on this before your divorce is finalized by creating a list of contacts or a “network” list that you can call once you are living on your own again.
Contact Our St. Charles Divorce Lawyers
Give yourself the time and energy you need to heal throughout the divorce process by allowing a knowledgeable, competent Lombard, IL divorce attorney to handle the legal aspects of your split. Call our dedicated team at Mevorah Law Offices LLC today at 630-755-6426 and schedule your personalized consultation.