When your divorce has you feeling stressed or upset, it is tempting to release your frustrations on an obvious target: your spouse. Petty or spiteful behavior may feel immediately satisfying, but it can have a negative impact on your divorce, with you often paying the price. Treating your spouse poorly, at the very least, is counterproductive towards amicable negotiations. In some situations, it can affect your allocation of parental responsibilities and the division of property. Here are four examples of spiteful behavior that you should avoid during your divorce:

  1. Taking Digs at Your Spouse During Negotiations: Your divorce negotiations are a time when you work out key details of your agreement. The process works best when both sides are professional and respectful towards each other. Snide comments directed towards your spouse makes them defensive and could lead to a larger argument. If you feel an urge to make such comments, it is better to stay quiet and let your attorney speak for you.
  2. Publicly Disparaging Your Spouse: Respectful behavior needs to extend beyond your face-to-face interactions. Badmouthing your spouse in public will upset them if they find out and make them less cooperative. It also reflects poorly on your character, which a divorce court judge may consider if asked to rule on your case. Assume that any conversations you have about your spouse could become public, whether you are talking to a friend or posting on social media.
  3. Using Your Children to Hurt Your Spouse: A spiteful divorcee may punish their spouse through their relationship with their children. Some divorced parents try to alienate their children from the other parent by disparaging the other parent in front of the children or withholding parenting time. Manipulating your children like this is harmful to them at a time when you should be comforting them. If your spouse shows the court evidence of this behavior, it could hurt your claim to parenting time.
  4. Hiding or Dissipating Marital Assets: Some divorcees try to get financial revenge on their spouse by hiding valuable assets or spending marital money for personal gain. Hiding or dissipating marital assets violates Illinois divorce law and will lead to punishment if you are caught. The divorce court will likely compensate your spouse for your actions by giving them a greater share of marital properties.

Contact a Kane County Divorce Lawyer

Divorce is a time when you need to be on your best behavior and consider how your actions could affect the outcome of your agreement. A St. Charles, Illinois, divorce attorney at Goostree Law Group will work with you on reaching an amicable and beneficial agreement. Schedule a free consultation by calling 630-584-4800.


When Divorce or Separation Turns Ugly